How feeling good helps you to achieve more
What makes you achieve is not just being productive or using your willpower – feel the fear and do it anyway. Your feelings and emotions also play an important role in how much you can achieve. Does that surprise you? The way you feel has valuable information to share. And when you’re willing to listen, explore and grow, you become less reliant on pushing through the fear and you can eliminate self-sabotage. Self-sabotage comes from a part of you that is programmed to keep you safe, the Inner Saboteur. For the Inner Saboteur moving forward and change are not so desirable. When faced with a perceived threat the inner saboteur feels fear. And when in the state of fear, your thinking and decision making isn’t performing at its best. When you feel good on the other hand, everything seems to flow so much better, doesn’t it?
Feel the fear and do it anyway?
When you find yourself procrastinating for example, you know on a rational, conscious level that something needs to be done. But, it’s just not happening. You have that internal dialogue filled with doubts, fears or you’re trying to convince yourself that distractions are more important. Still, you’re not taking action. You could try to feel the fear and do it anyway, but instead, pay close attention to what is really in your way at the core, in your thoughts, feelings and emotions. If you feel bad about yourself or even the goals you have set for yourself (conscious or unconscious), no amount of willpower is going to create an outcome that feels good.
The first step here is to address how you feel about yourself and your goals.
If the bad feelings really come from a place of misalignment with who you are and what you stand for, then abandon your quest. But, most of the time it’s a question of going out of your comfort zone to get to an outcome that is aligned and desirable. Then, pay attention to what is going on in your internal world and engage in the dialogue with different perspectives. It’s near enough impossible to positively achieve anything when you feel the fear that intense. It’s very restrictive when your whole being experiences moving out of your comfort zone as a ‘threat’.
However, when you can shift your perspective from ‘threat’ to survive to a ‘challenge’ to overcome, it becomes a different story. That is a great place to start. You can absolutely get your desired outcome when you shift your state of mind and being.
Start with feeling good about your goals
Change and growth start with a goal, with the end in mind, so make it compelling. You need to be aware of what you want to achieve to be able to create a plan to get there. Goals give us direction and guidance for focused action. They are not there to trip us up, goals are there to help us grow (even if your Inner Saboteur is trying to convince you otherwise).
Goals need to feel expansive, not like you want to go and hide under the table or hibernate for a couple of months (only to return to exactly where you were before). Never set goals based only on what you think you should be achieving, you will be setting yourself up to fail. Those kind of goals are most likely to pull you out of alignment with who you are and what you stand for anyway.
When you feel good about the goals you set you are more likely to achieve them. If you have a team that supports you in achieving your goals, feeling good about your team or organisational goals will also increase your ability to empower and engage them. Set your goals so that the end result feels good and exciting and consider why you set the goal. The why will keep you going even if it is taking you places you’ve never been before.
Achieve by feeling good about your day-to-day actions
A ‘to-do’-list can become a real source of busyness. Without the right actions, priorities and balanced allocation of time that day-to-day busyness just causes more overwhelm, stress and pressure. And overwhelm, stress and pressure, in turn, trigger the Inner Saboteur.
The key in completing action steps towards your goal is to connect those actions back to your goals and why you want to achieve them. Having a clear focused plan of action makes a massive difference, even if you have little time every day. What do you really need to focus on to achieve your goals (without overwhelm)? How can you allocate your time smarter to the things that really matter most? Is it really you who needs to do that action or do you need to delegate? Even if the action steps you need to take are taking you outside your comfort zone, staying focused on what really matters, does make a difference.
Celebrate every step along the way
It’s easy to forget or ignore the things we do and focus on what we haven’t done yet. As you progress with your actions towards your goals you easily forget the place you started is not where you are now, you have moved forward. Cultivating the habit of celebrating, gratitude and acknowledgement for every step along the way that you complete, not just for the big wins. It will make you feel good about your achievements, brings awareness and it sets you up for success. Completion feels good (your brain loves completion), so make sure you complete something (even if it is a small part of a bigger project) every day. Something that moves you towards your goals.
Finally, surrounding yourself with people who are positive and supportive is crucial. Surround yourself with other like-minded people who get you.
Being part of a patnership or community makes a massive difference in shifting the way you feel, think and behave. A good coach or mentor can also help you to shift your perspective, breakthrough self-sabotage and help you grow. It’s not always the easiest thing to do for yourself (even if you’re a coach). Most coaches will offer a consultation session to explore whether it’s the right match between what you need and the coach or mentor is able to offer.
You can be the leader in your own life and in your work. It is your choice. You can decide whether to live your life and work your way or let life and work be living you.